The Deadly Kiss
by Paranoid Pessimist
Summary: Usually when people are sad, they don’t do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change. This is During New Moon Before Bella started hanging with Jake. She found her strength and decided to live life.


**Hey you Guys! I've decided to put some of my stories on hold, i've gotten some major writer's block. But this idea popped up, so i decded that i'd write a little story with some Bella/Jessica bonding time. I know what you thinking right now 'HUH?', But jessica is always put as the evil snob in most of the stories on fanFiction, so i've decided to give her a chance in the spotlight.**

**_PLEASE TAKE THE POLL THAT'S ON MY PROFILE! I NEED IT FOR A FUTURE STORY!_**

**Disclaimer: A woman runs into the room huggin her child saying 'Honey we won the lottery and now you own Twilight!' Haha yep, to bad it was just a dream.**

**Songs That helped me write this cahpter (you should listen to them while reading this.)**

**-My Immortal : By: Evenesence  
-I miss You : By: Miley Cirus  
-What I've Done:By: Linkin Park (This one helped me A LOT!)**

**-Bella Rosalie Cullen**

**--**

**Bella P.O.V**

I watched as the rain splattered and dripped carelessly and freely on my window pane. My body was curled up in a ball as I sat by the window, thinking of all the times I had with _him_. A sob escaped my lips. He's been gone for 2 months now, and it still hurt to hear, or even think his name.

_Drip._

_Drop._

_Drip._

_Drop._

The rain expressed my true feelings. You don't die from a broken heart… you only wish you did. I felt the familiar hole opening in my chest, clutching my hands around myself in order to hold myself together, silent tears trickled down my cheeks.

**-FLASHBACK-**

_"Bella we're leaving." Edward told me, gazing into my eyes. The coldness in them startled me._

_"I'll come with you then." I responded. He stared back coldly. With a roll of nausea, I realized I'd misunderstood._

_"When you say we-" I whispered._

_"I mean my family and myself." He responded, each word separate and distinct. "My world is not for you." he said grimly._

_I shook my head back and forth. "You Promised! In Phoenix, you promised you'd stay with me forever-"_

_"As long as it was best for you." He interrupted._

_"NO! This is my soul isn't it?!" I shouted, furious, the words exploding out of me. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harder- like the liquid gold had frozen solid._

_"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He spoke the words slowly, his cold eyes on my face._

_"You... don't... want...me?" I choked out._

_"No."_

_I stared, uncomprehending, into his eyes. He looked away into the trees and spoke again. "Of course I'll always love you... in a way. I'm tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I'm not human." I took a look at his face. He was right, the icy planes of his face showed he wasn't human._

_"Don't." My voice was just a low whisper now. "Don't do this."_

_"You're no good for me, Bella." He waited a moment before continuing. "I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if i never existed."_

_My knees started to shake. I could hear the blood pounding faster than normal behind my ears. His voice sounded farther away._

_He smiled gently. "Don't worry. You're human- your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind."_

_"And your memories?" I asked. It sounded like there was something stuck in my throat, like i was choking._

_"Well"- he hesitated for a short second- "I won't forget. But MY kind... we're very easily distracted." he smiled, the smile was tranquil, it didn't touch his eyes._

_He took a step away from me.__  
__"That's everything i suppose. We won't bother you again." I closed my eyes, breathing deeply, my breath becoming shaky._

_"Goodbye Bella." he said in a calm, peaceful whisper. "Wait!" I cried out, there was a light, unnatural breeze. My eyes flashed open._

_He was gone. The Love of my life was gone... Forever. A sob escaped my lips as i lay down on the cold forest floor, and curled into a ball._

_Love, life, meaning... over._

**-END FLASHBACK-**

_It will be as if i never existed... Time heals all wounds for you're kind._

The velvety voice was melodic as his words echoed in my mind. I let out a scream of despair and muffled my face in my knees, trying to stop the sobs that erupted recklessly from inside me. A car pulled into the driveway and a couple minutes later, I heard my bedroom door creak open, and there stood Charlie, with take-out food. He glanced at me, his eyes full of worry, sadness and hurt. All i wanted to do was jump up and hug him tightly, telling him not to worry about me, that everything was fine... but i couldn't, i couldn't move. My body felt numb, stiff, and lifeless. As _He_ left, a half of me was taken away with him, a half of me that I'll never get back.

"Hey Bells." My dad greeted softly, as if he was afraid that speaking louder would hurt me. I didn't answer so he spoke up again, "I brought some pizza, do you want any?" I shook my head, and Charlie let out a soft, exasperated sigh while walking out of my room and closing the door behind him.

I'm just human. That's exactly what i am. A pathetic human. Ever since i met Edward, i knew he was too good for me, a god in other words. And i was just another worshiper. After a year, Edward finally realized that I wasn't any good for him. Hell, he's probably sucking Tanya's face right now. Why wouldn't he? She's a beautiful, graceful vampire, and I'm just plain, old, ugly me.

I bit my bottom lip as my vision scanned my bedroom. The place that _He _snuck in at night and the slept with me, the place that he and I kissed, the place held so much memories. My vision blurred, and I blinked away my tears, tired of crying. Everything reminded me of _him_. Every movie, every song, every book. I couldn't even turn on the radio without bringing back memories of us together.

Heaving myself from the position I was curled in for the past couple of hours, I grabbed whatever book I caught sight of first. Knowing this would be a bad idea, I still flipped it open to a random page. As I read along, my eyes froze on a certain sentence.

_"No matter who broke your heart, or how long it takes to heal, you'll never get through it without your Friends."_

A simple, short sentence, yet so powerful. My mind flashed back to all the times Jessica, Mike, Angela and Ben tried to help me through my days of gloom, I just pushed them away as if they were a speck of dirt. Guilt and anger for myself instantly rushed through me. My hands clenched into fists as I felt a strong spark of something I haven't felt in a long time… Confidence?

Grabbing my phone from my dresser, I dialed Jessica's number. Three rings later, I heard a voice that I haven't heard since the day in the parking lot.

"Hello?" Jessica asked, I could hear several giggles and laughter in the background.

"Hey." I greeted softly as I sat at the edge of my bed.

"Bella?" Jessica's voice was flooded with Surprise, confusion and happiness. The voices in the background hushed down as soon as she spoke my name.

"Yeah." I answered, hearing a muffled voice in the background.

"Here, Mike wants me to put you on speaker." Her voice trailed off as I heard a 'click' of a button and then rustling.

"Hey Bella." Mike, Angela and Ben chorused in unison. A small smile tugged at my lips. I haven't talked to them in a while.

"Hey guys. What's new?" There was a thick layer of guilt in the air, which made it a little awkward for me.

"Now much, we're hanging out at a restaurant in Port Angels for a while." Angela Replied. "But most importantly, how are you doing?" Her voice softened.

"I-I'm doing fine." Afraid that it would crack if i spoke louder, my voice was barely below a whisper, I'm surprised she still heard it.

"Oh Bella, I'm sorry for bringing that up."

"No, you guys its fine. You don't need to apologize for anything. You guys tried to help me from my zombie state, but i just ignored you. A break up is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it, and I've realized that he might have meant everything to me, but i meant nothing to him." My voice grew a little near the end as i finished my speech up.

They were silent for a while and Mike finally broke the silence. "Wow."

Ben spoke up for the first time. "Yeah, Bella it's okay. We know it's hard to go through Break-up, but the pain will go away eventually. You can try to write out lyrics to songs to help you control your sadness and anger."

My smile widened. "Thanks Ben, I'll try that."

"No problem. It always helped me through bad situations." He replied.

There was a short pause before I spoke up again. "Do you guys want to hang out tomorrow? Maybe go to the movies or something?"

"Are you sure..?" Jessica questioned, i could hear the doubt and worry in her voice, worry for me.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure."

"Alright then, we'll call you tomorrow near the afternoon to set up the exact details." Jessica paused for a second, I heard another 'click' probably taking speaker phone off, and the voices in the restaurant grew softer and softer until it was complete silence. A door closed, and I'm guessing she left to the bathroom to talk with me privately. After a while she spoke up again. "Oh and Bella, no matter what you think Ed-" She caught herself, knowing that his name would cause me sadness, "_He_ was a jerk, and no matter what you think or say won't change it. **He** doesn't deserve you, not the other way around." My eyes started to water at the strong words she spoke, and meant.

**-FLASHBACK-**

_I was walking to the school parking lot in search for my truck; the final bell rang, signaling that another miserable day was over. _

_"Bella! Wait!" A voice rang out as i turned to find Jessica running after me._

_My hair fell in front of my face and formed a curtain as my head hung low, and i clutched my books to my chest tightly._

_"Bella-" She panted a little, for running across the parking lot. She caught her breath and straightened out before continuing. "Bella, I know that_ _when the Cullen's were still here, I acted like a snob," I opened my mouth to speak but she cut me off, "Bella, I know i was a snob. It's just that I had a crush on Edward for a while, and i was just jealous of you for coming here and gaining his attention, like that, without even trying. I'm sorry for that. I knew how much you two meant for each other, and I'm sorry for acting that way. I want you to know I'm here for you, and that you can call me anytime to talk. A bend in the road is not the end of the road… unless you fail to make the turn." She finished and let out a sigh._

_Trying not to cry, I looked away. But a single tear still managed to escape, and form a path down my cheek, and for the first time in months, it had been a tear of happiness. Jessica, seeing this, came closer and carefully wrapped her arms around my shoulders in a sisterly way. "Thank You, Jessica. That meant so much to me." I managed to croak out. She just nodded and we stood there for a while, hugging each other._

**-End FLASHBACK-**

"Jessica, thank you so much. You've really helped me through this, a lot. I can't thank you enough." I bit my lip to prevent the escape of the tears that were swimming in my eyes.

"No problem, Bella. That's what I'm here for. Oh and, it great to see that you've made a turn." She quoted the last part from the day in the parking lot. I gave a smile as I walked out the door of my bedroom, and down the stairs.

"Thank You. I'll see you tomorrow." I responded when i was getting closer to the kitchen.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow." I could hear the smile in her voice as she hung up. This was the first time I'd spoken to Jessica since the parking lot. She was an amazing friend along with Angela, Ben and Mike. And i was grateful for that.

I walked into the kitchen, a huge smile still plastered on my face. As soon as Charlie saw me, his face turned to shock. And i knew why, because this is the first true, genuine smile that I've gave since the Cullen's left. I grinned internally as i realized that saying their name barely hurt me anymore.

"Hey Bells." Charlie greeted carefully, surprise still evident on his face.

"Hey Dad. Do you have any notebook paper here?" He fiddled around, glancing at me every once in a while to make sure this wasn't a dream, that i was really smiling. After a minute of searching, he pulled out a notebook and handed it to me. "Thanks Dad." I gave him a quick peck on the cheek, and pulled away finding a pencil and heading back up the stairs to my room.

I decided to take Ben's advice, so i made myself comfortable on the bed, and started writing.

--

Two hours passed, and it became dark outside. Taking a sideways glance at my clock, i noted that it was 10:24 P.M. putting the notebook down on the side of my bed; i turned off the light and huddled under my warm covers, awaiting tomorrow to come.

--

**Narrator P.O.V**

But what Bella didn't notice was the page that slipped out from her notebook. The page that read the lyrics to her song:

_My life has been hell without you,  
__You just walked away thinking you could,  
__My hearts been shattered to pieces, just hearing you're name._

_The anguish you left me in,  
__Caused me to crack  
__I just can't take it anymore  
__You're love and touch, are the things I lack  
__So I cry, and curl up on the floor_

_The pain you caused was unbearable  
__The hurt you left was all true,  
__The tears I shed formed a river full,  
__And still, I'm waiting for you._

_The way you're stone arms embraced around me,  
__Made me feel so strong and safe.  
__You said you'd never leave my side,  
__And that you'd protect me to._

_When you're breath creased the nape of neck,  
__It gave me a strong sensation,  
__My heart went thump, and my knees collapsed,  
__The wind was knocked out of me._

_The pain you caused was unbearable  
__The hurt you left was all true,  
__The tears I shed formed a river full,  
__And still, I'm waiting for you._

_Every time you kissed me,  
__The blood pulsed in my veins.  
__They were memories I knew,  
__I would never replace._

_I still can't forget all the love you gave,  
__All the kisses and hugs we endured  
__You told me that you'd never leave,  
__And yet, you still do._

_The pain you caused was unbearable  
__The hurt you left was all true,  
__The tears I shed formed a river full,  
__And still, I'm waiting for you._

_And still, I'm waiting for you._

_And still… I'm waiting… For you…_

_--_

**Moral of this story:**

Usually when people are sad, they don't do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change.

--

**Sooo, what did you think? Oh and the lyrics in this song belong and are copyrighted to ME. I wrote them. The new moon quoting part in the beginning, i wrote from my memory, so i'm sorry if it seems a bit off track. Please Review and tell me what you think.**

**I just couldn't resist inserting those quotes in random sections of the story : Should i continue this, or leave it as a ONE-SHOT?**

**Reviews make Bella happy :D**

**-Bella Rosalie Cullen**


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